Raiders of the Lost Ark, a 40th anniversary reassessment by Dr. Rene Belloq, Archeologist
Bonjour. Like the bon mot about Mrs. Lincoln and the play, I am still asked, 40 years hence: aside from the ending, […]
A Song for Vegas
My dad opens the door. Light streams into the dim interior. Electronic lights flutter softly. Video games line the walls. […]
Pizza Rat
began as an ordinary rodent gray, uninteresting even to others of his kind. One day city officials decided to clean […]
Chris Farley
My daughter’s hair is now long enough For her to wake up with bedhead. She’ll stand in her crib, gripping […]
Some Guy Named Stephen King Begged To Join Our Writers’ Workshop. What Do You Think We Told Him?
My basement writers’ workshop is clearly the hottest ticket in Maine. But when our tech writer for outboard motor repair […]
From the Pop-Tarts Test Kitchen: Coming Soon to a Toaster Near You?
1) Blueberry Butane: How about a Tart you carry in your pocket and warm with simple friction? Intriguing, but hard […]
How to Make Money in 3 Easy Steps
He returns to the dorm room in the midst of disaster. He turns the knob and walks in on two […]
Halloween Kills Review
Halloween Kills is a movie that is of its franchise, through and through. The latest return to Haddonfield features plenty […]
Evil Eye: Malignant’s Future as a Cult Classic
*The following contains spoilers for Malignant (2021). * Now, whenever I visit my hometown—which I recently did—I think about my […]
Two Poems By Barbara Genova
demons enter the picture from the right where I’m from, there used to be another name for the bridge they […]
Head First
I really hopeyou weren’t therethe day I divedhead firstinto the wavestrying to find outif I might be asea monster Almost […]
PLANES, BRAINS, AND AUTOMOBILES
People drive too fast these days. Have you noticed? I have. What’s the hurry? That’s what I’d like to know. […]
I went to a craft beer festival for two years straight with two different men and broke up with them shortly afterwards
It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that my first love was beer. My father used to take me to […]
WHY ARE THERE 10,000 LAYERS IN THIS FILE?
Why are there 10,000 layers in this file? I’m asking because I just opened it up and there are 10,000 layers […]
Expectations of the Evening
The three meat and four cheese frozen lasagne and the “restaurant-style” dough balls with the garlic butter (free of either […]
just because you hurt people doesn’t mean I want to beat you
suckling at the suture of a hyper-realism likea colour will pass through your lipsfill up your stomachlike a steak knife, […]