It appears we’re all celebrating Keanu Reeves today, so I thought I’d share some fun facts about him.

Fact #1: He’s married to Winona Ryder.

(someone yelling from the next room)

What? I thought they were…

(more yelling)

But there are all those pictures of them together!

(mumble mumble)

Oh, that was just for a movie?  What was the movie? Was it about a wedding?

(mumbles…)

Oh.  Well then who is Keanu Reeves?  He’s the one from that 90s movie, right?

(shouts from the living room)

I don’t know which 90s movie! That one that’s always on TV, oh you know the one I’m talking about! Your brother used to watch it all the time.

(The smack of a loud facepalm fills the room)

Are you sure he’s not married to Winona Ryder? I swear I’ve seen pictures of them together somewhere.

(the sound of a Lay-Z-Boy being brought back to its upright position…a door opening…then closing)

Oh, he’s always in such a bad. Anyhoo, just wanted to wish that Keanu man a happy birthday!

Keith Langston writes for Travel Channel, Screen Rant, and Passport Magazine, among others. His personal essays have been featured in Hobart and Talking Writing. His passions are travel, film, and tea.