It doesn’t get easier to think of yourself as wonderful,
even with confirmation and references
from people who you love and trust
more than you name it.

I’m so many canned Bloody Marys in
that I can’t remember if I used my mouthwash already or not,
so I do it (again?),
and I love the burning feeling that says we are coming clean.

I love how well I take care of myself,
even when the room swirls and I want to let go and fall into it.
I even floss. Amazing.
Maybe I am wonderful?

I say goodnight to everyone who may, maybe, say I love you,
and I’m (always) surprised –
so many of them do.

I say it right back because it’s true,
and that’s why I wake up happy despite the hangover
(that I for sure shouldn’t have at 21, wtf…oh well I guess).

Meredith Phipps (she/her) is a current undergraduate student at Barnard College where she studies English and works as a Writing Fellow. She bounces back and forth between Manhattan and northern Indiana. She has current or upcoming work in Dream Journal, Dwelling Literary, and Northern Otter, among others. (twitter: @merzi1999 ; instagram: @meredithphipps99)