as I tap my Cap’n Crunch – Crunch Berries
the dog stares at me head cocked
chin tilted slightly up eyes all knowing
my wife hates the Clink, Clink, Clink
spoon off the side of the bowl
If I wanted dry cereal, I wouldn’t have
put the fucking milk on it! all the berries must be wet!
I know she’s not smart
the dog, not my wife
I watched her miss one of two steps
that lead to the front porch face-planting
not one small cry or yelp
She eats bunny poop in the front yard
She always wants to lick my feet
The dog, not my wife
She won’t even look at those nasty things
but the way the she looks searching
into my eyes right now
The dog, not my wife
I believe she has all the answers
to all the big questions
The dog she knows
but we both know the really big question
floating through that fluffy white head
When am I going to miss my mouth?
Sending a crunch berry rolling down my chin
bouncing off my belly and landing right at her feet
All the big answers
Jason Melvin received a gimmicky T-shirt from his teenage daughter on Christmas with a picture of one large fist fist-bumping a much smaller fist. The caption read, “Behind every smart-ass daughter is a truly asshole Dad”. It fit.