The Villages, Florida – The search continues for local plumber Bill Myers last seen going down the drain at Taco Bell.
James Frederick joined Myers on the service call to clear a clogged sink at the fast food restaurant. “I reached for a drain auger and when I turned back around, his boots were circling the drain.” Frederick utilized a pipe wrench in attempt to free his Plumb Crazy business partner, but Myers had already cleared the sink trap. ‘He took the clog right along with him.”
Sink traps are best known by consumers for catching objects accidentally lost down the drain.
The Taco Bell shift manager asked not to be identified. “I feel for Mr. Myers, I really do, he’s got tacos on the house for life as far as I’m concerned, but now that the clog is cleared, I want the police line tape gone, like now. I’ve got a ****load of Taco and Burrito party packs to prepare for the Ladies Mahjong Tournament later this week and I want my kitchen back.”
No evacuations have been ordered for Taco Bell or the surrounding area. Police have asked residents living in the Florida senior retirement community to report any suspicious holes in the ground, creaks, cracks or unusual odors. The smell of sewer gas may indicate Myers’ attempt to reenter a building back through the pipes.
Robert Morris, President of the UA Plumbers & Pipefitters Local Union 666 urged patience. “Anything is possible. This is the first ‘sink’ hole I’ve ever heard involving a sink, commercial or otherwise. What we don’t want to do is fill the drain with cement and block return access.”
Typical sinkholes are cavities formed when water erodes an underlying rock layer. The Villages have sustained a number of sinkholes since 2002. The most recent reconfigured a neighborhood cul-de-sac into a small retention pond. Several “For Sale” signs were viewed floating the surface. Plumb Crazy has service calls scheduled in the area throughout this month. Frederick will carry on alone and vows to keep searching. “It’s a wait and watch situation. If only we had used the plunger first, we’d be sitting table high in black bean quesaritos right about now.”
Taco Bell Corporate Headquarters declined comment for this report.
Sheree Shatsky is known for driving beater cars. She currently drives a 2004 Saturn Ion, best car on the planet. She believes The Villages is Florida’s gift to the humor genre. This long time Floridian tweets @talktomememe.
Categories: Funny News