1.      Comprised of nucleic acid genomes in a protective coating

2.      Dubious origins

3.      Infectious personality

4.      Unpredictable

5.      Never wants to go out unless it’s to a party

6.      Resents anyone who plays hard-to-get

7.      Embraces poor hygiene habits

8.      Comes around only when he needs a warm body

9.      When you’re with him, your friends avoid you

10.     Can give you a rash, or worse

11.     Makes you long for the days when it was just the two of you

Answers:

1-10: Coronavirus, the common cold AND my Ex

11: The common cold. All it took was a Sudafed and Nyquil to make it go away

Nancy Franklin has been published in The Daily Drunk, Points in Case and the Los Angeles Times. She writes about life’s absurdities wherever and whenever she finds them. She also enjoys flaming shots of tequila, sometimes even when writing. Follow her on twitter, @mirthquakes_.