President Trump’s Non-Inaugural Dinner Menu

Trump Specialty Cocktails
Moscow Mule
Pornstar Martini
Dark n’Stormy

Pence Specialty Cocktails
Old Fashioned
Corpse Reviver

Hors d’Oeuvres
Puffed-Up Pastry
Deviled Eggs (If Mother Approves)

Amuse Bouche
‘Thigh’ Shrimp Salad
Radical Purée

Snapping Turtle
(Mitch McConnell Recipe)

Tossed, Chopped & Shredded
Unconstitutional Dressing

Poached in a Civil Rights Reduction

First Main ‘Coarse’
Liberal Tears Seasoning

Palate Cleanser
Champagne Jello Shots
Served On Trump Chocolate Commemorative Coins

Second Main Course
Chicken á la King
Over Rue-the-Day Antifa-sta

Cheese Course
Kraft Cheese Whiz
Puttin’ On The Ritz Crackers

Baked Alaska
Arctic National Wildlife Refuge Oil Flambé

President-Elect Joe Biden’s Inaugural Dinner Menu

Zoom Potluck

Nancy Franklin has been published in The Daily Drunk, Points In Case and the Los Angeles Times. She enjoys cold beer and flaming shots of tequila, even when writing. Follow her on Twitter, @mirthquakes_.

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Shawn Berman runs The Daily Drunk. You can follow him on Twitter @Sbb_writer.

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