President Trump’s Non-Inaugural Dinner Menu

Trump Specialty Cocktails
Moscow Mule
Pornstar Martini
Dark n’Stormy

Pence Specialty Cocktails
Old Fashioned
Corpse Reviver

Hors d’Oeuvres
Puffed-Up Pastry
Crude-ités
Deviled Eggs (If Mother Approves)
McNuggets

Amuse Bouche
‘Thigh’ Shrimp Salad
Radical Purée

Soup
Snapping Turtle
(Mitch McConnell Recipe)

Salad
Tossed, Chopped & Shredded
Unconstitutional Dressing

Fish
Pufferfish
Poached in a Civil Rights Reduction

First Main ‘Coarse’
Bambi
Liberal Tears Seasoning

Palate Cleanser
Champagne Jello Shots
Served On Trump Chocolate Commemorative Coins

Second Main Course
Chicken á la King
Over Rue-the-Day Antifa-sta

Cheese Course
Kraft Cheese Whiz
Puttin’ On The Ritz Crackers

Dessert
Baked Alaska
Arctic National Wildlife Refuge Oil Flambé

President-Elect Joe Biden’s Inaugural Dinner Menu

Zoom Potluck



Nancy Franklin has been published in The Daily Drunk, Points In Case and the Los Angeles Times. She enjoys cold beer and flaming shots of tequila, even when writing. Follow her on Twitter, @mirthquakes_.

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