Schrödinger’s Shrink Wrap

It isn’t the ideal place for the session, amongst the Dexion racking and the reminders. 

But it’s better than anywhere else in the house. 

It’s quiet up here, undisturbed, with the barely used desktop computer grinding only a little, 

As it boots up, as Matt connects, as he casts his eyes over the shelving dust situation. 

The Japanese 25th anniversary Alien Quadrilogy 9 DVD Bust continues to look magnificent, beast of a Limited Edition that it is, 

But the shrink wrap is easier to dust than the plastic beneath, 

And, Helen might have a point about the Special Features, 

One day he will want to work his way through the Special Features, 

But – come on – that isn’t why he bought it. 

It isn’t like there aren’t another six or seven Alien sets lurking quite appropriately in the shadows. 

It isn’t like those aren’t on the To Watch list, too.  

Once he’s unwrapped them. 

Once he’s determined to crack the seals,  

Running his fingernail down the plastic seams, 

Letting out that “As New” plastic smell, 

Committed to This Being The Time to put them on. 

It isn’t the ideal place for the session, amongst the Dexion racking and the reminders. 

The Home Alone Limited Edition paint can. 

The Scarface Humidor. 

The Dark Knight Rises Batman Cowl. 

Is it that their value plummets as soon as they’re opened? 

Is he waiting out the eBay moment, when he lets them go for silly money? 

New in box. Unwatched. Still sealed.” 

Potentially perfect viewing experiences, 

Forever perfect until unsealed. 

Isn’t this the ideal time to ask? 

Shouldn’t he make use of the opportunity to ask the expert, 

What this has all, any of it, been about. 

Now that he has committed to seeking Help. 

Or should he just angle the webcam away from the racks 

And let those mighty beasts of his sleep on? 



Mike Hickman (@MikeHicWriter) is a writer from York, England. He has written for Off the Rock Productions (stage and audio), including 2018’s “Not So Funny Now” about Groucho Marx and Erin Fleming. He has recently been published in EllipsisZine, Dwelling Literary, Bandit Fiction, Nymphs, Flash Fiction Magazine, Brown Bag, and Safe and Sound Press. His co-written, completed six-part BBC radio sit com remains frustratingly as unproduced as it was the last time he updated this biography. Does anyone know any independent radio producers?

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