when you wake up 

and see the last remnants 

of a bottle of gin 

on the counter 

and you can barely 

remember the sex from last night 

and you know you posted 

some crazy shit online 

and didn’t brush… 

and there’s half a quesadilla on top of the dresser… and you have a headache 

and you check your texts… 

and you swear to god you’ll 

drink seltzers for a week 

well 

that’s not even the worst of it 

because when you peel back 

the curtain 

and you see your neighbor out 

on his driveway 

standing by his cadillac 

the one you could never afford 

he has his hands on his hips 

he’s confused 

there’s a penis keyed 

into the driver’s door 

and there’s a tv 

sticking out of the windshield 

why the hell is there a tv 

sticking out of the windshield 

and you realize it’s your tv 

and it’s going to be a shitty day



Adam Johnson lives in Minneapolis, Minnesota.